What is the importance of role models and what do you say to people who think they are not “special” enough to be a role model? I think that everyday people can be role models. Everyone is different and everyone has something positive to offer.  I truly believe that role models are important and vital to our own individual growth, as we follow their example we can also learn from their mistakes.  You don’t have to have the powers to move a mountain to be considered a role model; for example one of my role models is my grandmother.  My grandmother raised six children on her own while working two jobs.  If that isn’t strength to emulate I don’t know what is.

What advice do you have for teens whose parents are drug addicts or unstable but who do not have the fortune of loving family members for support? Start watching out for yourself. Take care of yourself, feel out your own independence and start setting goals.  Start small, with setting goals like—don’t be late for school.  Seek out the people in your life you can count on.  There will always be someone.  Whether it’s a guidance counselor, a mentor, another family member, anyone you can trust and talk to.  Support can come in many varieties.  Like this Web site for example. 

How did you keep your outlook for the future positive and stay motivated despite everything that you went through? I just think of the truth.  The truth is there is light at the end of whatever you’re going through.  Like this too shall pass kind of thinking. I kept my eyes open for new opportunities, new ways to learn and experience things for myself.  The more I accomplish, the greater my drive.  It started small for me.  Like getting my first “A” in math. That feeling of accomplishment is empowering and substitutes the negative. 

What do you have to say to the boy or girl whose life seems hopeless and is looking to drugs or drinking to cope? If you feel like turning to substances to mask your problems, ask yourself why. Are you calling out for help, in hopes that someone will notice your problems and pay you the attention you so desperately need?  We all need attention, some form of affection, but talking is the best answer. People around you don’t know what’s going on inside unless you tell them what’s going on inside.  Abusing substance will only make things worse, the hole you may feel you’re in, will only get deeper, and that light you once saw, will only fade.  I’ve seen it, and talking with someone, anyone, will help.  Have faith in tomorrow.  Eventually something good will happen. Promise! 

How have you grown as an individual, especially as a woman, from your experiences? I had to grow-up or at least wise-up fast.  With two drug addicted parents you have to watch out for yourself. I think you should always watch out for yourself regardless of your situation because life can turn on a dime. I learned what my strengths were and I figured out my weaknesses.  I was so happy to have the ability to go to college and since I graduated from high school I have changed so much.  Change is one thing we can always count on.  As a women’s studies minor, I have learned about things I had never realized or considered. I encourage every young woman (and young man for that matter) to take an Intro to Women’s Studies course.  You learn a lot about yourself.

What other general advice or knowledge do you have for teens? Don’t worry about the way you look, what you’re wearing, or if you have big gaudy braces. No one will remember if you had a pimple on your chin; and if they do and they hold that against you, then they are the people who need to get over it.  It’s difficult not to judge other people, I know, but what I know is what comes around goes around. If you treat people, all people, the way you like to be treated (golden rule, right?) than it all goes hand in hand.  Understand the importance of family.  Family doesn’t necessarily mean blood related either; your friends can be your family too.  Take pride in what makes you, “you”.